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The Least You Can Do is Say THANK YOU!

Today is the 70th Anniversary of the historic D-Day -  Allied Forces invasion of Europe.  The strategy, intensity and complexity of that planned attack contributed to the ending of WW2 in 1945.  The cost was many American soldiers' lives, but the success was far reaching. 

I'm privileged to have a close friend who was a POW in WW2.  I've thanked him many times for his willingness to sacrifice for our country.  With tears, he's always responded, "It was my honor."  He's in his early nineties and the moments we are afforded in relationship are limited.  Our time together is filled with his accounts of the conquests and failures of the war.  I cherish what we share around coffee, stories and God's Word.  To have him as a friend and representation of the "greatest generation" is an honor I will not soon forget. 

When I say THANK YOU to him, it is filled with much emotion about what I know and even what I don't.  But, I've learned that uttering those words is the least that I can say when we are together.  And, that expression of appreciation softens his heart and warms our relationship. 

Expressing thanks is huge in every arena of life.  When we take the time to say THANK YOU, even for the smallest acts of generosity, we open ourselves up to what life is all about - GIVING.  Ignoring the kindnesses of a cup of coffee, a lunch or a gift in the mail is ultimately assuming it was deserved.  The opposite of gratitude is entitlement.  And, that is an ugly way of living.  When we are only thankful for the larger things in life, we limit life in all of its fullness, because what we share together on this earth is about the small gestures here and there. 

So, pause today and thank your family member for making the breakfast, your friend for meeting you for lunch, your employer for the job opportunity, or a veteran for their sacrifice for our freedom.  And, if you are on the receiving in of that thanks, please..., please...say YOU'RE WELCOME!

Who can you thank today for what they've given, whether it be large or small?

12 Ways to Intentionally Serve the Team You Lead

Serving others in the context of leadership impacts everything that a leader is and does.  Whether the leader is endeavoring to cast vision, clarify roles, or negotiate through relational tensions, an attitude of service aids in the whole process of communication and enables genuine connection.  Conversely, I’ve found by personal experience that constant potential for unnecessary misunderstandings abound when humility is absent in leadership. So, let's move servant leadership beyond a concept to a lifestyle.  Here is a list of ways to intentionally serve those you lead:

1.   Ask regularly how they are getting along in their personal life.
2.   Invite their input on big decisions.
3.   Listen intently in dialogue with them. 
4.   Resource them with practical tools to help them carry out the organization's mission.
5.   Keep the mission, vision, values and strategy before them continually.
6.   Define the part each member plays on the team.
7.   Make sure assignments and expectations are clear.
8.   Give them opportunities that convey belief and value.
9.   Follow up on assigned projects with authentic feedback and praise.  
10. Ask them periodically how you are doing as their leader.
11. Schedule and spend relational and recreational time as a team. 
12. Plan the party, celebrate wins together and reward them individually!

Leaders must never underestimate the primary role they play as investors in their team.  Detachment is not leadership!  Regular, intentional involvement with people is the essence of what leaders do.  Go and lead your team today!

How can you take these practical tools and put them to work for your team immediately?

Two Distinguishing Factors of Effective Leaders

What have you been learning lately?  That is a question I hear asked in a lot of leadership circles.  And, it's a good one because of the personally probing nature.  Reading a good deal of information on a regular basis, going to annual conferences, and listening to the latest podcast are standard resources for leaders in today's world.  Profoundly, however, that is just not enough.  Amassing information without really learning can be nothing more than a waste of time.  What is the material teaching you?  How does it fit in your context?  What healthy discussions with your team are coming out of such experiences?  These kinds of questions will help determine if the resource is valuable in the long run.  Learning to better yourself and your organization distinguishes effective leaders from those who are just going through the motions, so to speak.

A second factor in effective leadership takes learning to a next level.  Here's a question that isn't heard as often but could possibly inch close in importance to the first:  What have you learned lately that you are in the process of implementing?  Learning hasn't reached its real significance until it can be applied.  The last thing I want to do is retake a test that I didn't do so well in the first time around.  Passing the proverbial tests of leadership comes when I apply what I'm learning.  So, here's a good formula for raising your level of effectiveness today:  Experience to learn and learn to apply!

What have you been learning lately?  And, what have you learned lately that you can begin to implement?

How Would Jesus Do Your Job Differently?

There is no greater way to personally probe deeply into what you do and how you are doing it than by asking self-examination questions.  One that I have been thinking on lately...and, am adopting into my regular weekly questionnaire is how would Jesus do my job differently?  It's one that is painfully necessary.  My life is flawed; His life isn't.  As a matter of fact, Scripture is clear in that though Christ was tempted in every way like we are, His life remained sinless.  What a life to learn from...! 

So, how would Christ do your job differently?  How would His responses be different?  What attitudes that have been somewhat unbridled in your life would be kept at bay in His?  Why would He make a certain decision that you chose not to make?  In what areas would Christ show patience that, in the same areas, you haven't?  Who would He connect with...?  What would His calendar look like...?  How often would He engage in outside lunches...?  How much time would he spend in planning...?  What would His annual budget contain...? 

Continue the questions by framing them in light of how Christ would do your job today. 
Ultimately, Jesus is our Life Coach.  He has already mastered every relational issue and on-the-job obstacle.  And, doing it as He already has and says to do it is the critical ingredients to raising our standard of excellence and significance. 

A final thought would relate to the profound grace that He offers.  The reality is that the way Christ would do your job would be different through you than the way He would do it through someone else.  Lean into the nudges of the Holy Spirit today.  Depending more intentionally on His grace might serve a different approach after all. 

So, how might Jesus do your job differently?

The Ugly Side of Impatience

Patience is not always popular in a culture of "get it done" and "never enough time."  Frankly, some leaders choose impatience over the risk of seeming lazy.  I am so for a healthy work ethic.  The last thing your organization needs is slothfulness and lack of enthusiastic production.  The paradox, however, lies in the impatience for mediocrity and a spirit of impatience.  Such a spirit can appear to take over more areas than just business, for instance.  When traffic isn't moving fast enough for you on your city's turnpike or friends' stories never seem short enough to your ears, an ongoing, problematic issue might be surfacing.  Pause to take some inventory of your day's activities?  Do you see a pattern of impatient responses...?  It's been said that you cannot be impatient and humble at the same time.  That is such a WOW truth!  Author Gene Wilkes writes in his book Jesus on Leadership, "Impatience causes leaders to sacrifice insight for effort.  It causes us to trust our natural instincts rather than God's work in our life."  I've taken this whole matter of impatience in my life to a whole new level of prayer.  The last thing I want people to see in me is the ugly reactions to any lack of patience.  What about you...?  Why don't you join me now in surrendering the spirit of impatience to Christ and depending more deeply on His grace to calm you in seemingly rushed times...  The Christ in you is ready to be seen!

What issues of impatience do you need to surrender to Christ today?

It's Always Better to Follow First

Leadership has been the buzz word since the eighties.  And, there's nothing I enjoy studying more than what it means to lead well.  However, a huge dynamic is missing many times when pursuing this learning venture.  All the while the subject of leadership is getting front stage, a more important study is being left in the proverbial props closet.  It has been my observation that leaders are only as good at leading as they are following.  Frankly, leaders are effective when they're better followers. 

Author and President of the National Association of Evangelicals, Leith Anderson has observed that "the Bible says comparatively little about leadership and a great deal about followership."  Being an effective follower means understanding and serving the mission.  A follower appreciates authority, collaboration, strategic players and common goals.  Good followers deny any value in unbridled competition and personal fits of jealousy.  When leaders don't have anyone or anything to follow, they isolate themselves from reality, meaningful exchange and lasting significance.  Great followers make potent leaders.  Yes, it's always better to follow first...and to lead a life of following before you ever consider leading anyone!

How are you doing at following?  In what ways can you better align yourself with the organizational mission?

Worshipping Quietly

Not often that I post on Sunday, but today is very much worth writing about...

Palm Sunday and this coming Passion Week is maybe overlooked by our exuberant worship because we, as Christ-followers, live on this side of the Cross.  However, pausing on the palm-waving could actually serve us well in remembering more deeply.  Why?  Pausing to worship quietly reflects how Christ might have viewed things at that very moment.  It is, in fact, the last week of His life here on earth.  There is no doubt much on His heart and mind.  He knows that His time is drawing near.  And, the "triumphant entry" as we term it, starts the clock for the most important week in the history of the world.

"Blessed is he who comes in the Name of the Lord..." is appropriate in light of who He is.  But how sincere was their gregarious worship?  For as the hours turned to days approaching the arrest and trial of Christ, those thick crowds of eager palm-wavers thinned to just a faithful few who stood vigil at the Cross.  

It appears that true, genuine worship might begin quietly.  How can we rightly celebrate an empty tomb without first reflecting deeply on what put Him there?!?  Richard Foster, in his book Sanctuary of the Soul, writes, "Worship can be fully valid when there are no thrills or flights of ecstasy."  Allow the true meditation on His suffering instead of the crescendo of the music to bring you into heartfelt worship.  For He alone is worthy!

What needs to be turned off or tuned out in order for true worship to come forth from your heart this week?

Why Know-it-alls Won't Stay There Long Term

Ever met someone that you couldn't tell them about anything new?  They already knew it...  Those kinds of people are unfortunately everywhere.  (I use to make up stories just to throw off people like that.)  It's like a child...  You tell them something and they respond, "I know that..."  Adults are worse.  They've allowed years of dogmatism and maturing egos to make them close-minded. 

Proverbs 12:1 (a book for career students) says, "Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid."  In other words, "know-it-alls" are not intelligent people.  They aren't smart at all.  When we refuse to allow good counsel to bend us, we will eventually break by the demands of life.  Here's the point: People who feel like they "know-it-all" can get to certain places, but they don't stay there long.  Life is made up of too many evaluations and course corrections to assume knowledge arrival!  Those who choose to remain the same potentially lose their influence and ultimately any intended impact.  The key to long term effectiveness is possessing a teachable spirit.  So, let's check our ego in at the door and actually stay a while!

Who do you need to listen to more intently and openly?  What decision needs to be altered or course, corrected in your life or business today?

Why Red is the Wrong Color of Carpet in Your Church

Aside from the fact that red would be an incredibly audacious color of carpet in any church, the idea behind this claim is much larger.  The "red carpet" mentality is not meant for the body of Christ.  As a matter of fact, the biblical description of Christ's Church and her leadership is the contrast.  To encourage this poignant picture will put everything (and, everyone) in the proper place.  Christ demonstrated humility in his life and mission.  His service unto death models for us the spirit that must be embodied within His Church.  When men take joy or find comparisons in their own bios, the right intention of ministry erodes.  Fostering or protecting big titles over pure serving is evil and will dilute the message of the gospel.  Healthy authority brings clarity; ego-centered agendas are distracting. Servant leadership is the solution for overcoming the temptation to flex muscles of self-image.  Whether you actually chose red carpet as a floor covering in your church building, the celebrity runway should be reserved for only ONE!

What steps do you need to take and put into practice to keep personal ego at bay?

The One Thing That Will Keep Your Life Motivated

There is one thing that will keep your life motivated!  When all else will seem to fail, an intrinsic prod will prevail: love is the great motivator.  Without love, life has no meaning.  Rather, love fills our days with passionate purpose.  Love means I can forgive, I can release, I can work hard, I can have fun, I can enjoy others around me...  You don't have to have a "special someone" to stay motivated today and everyday.  It's all based on a renewed understanding that love is Christ-centered and can impact everything you do! 

Love is the factory for patience, kindness and humility.  It is the groundwork for all healthy relationships.  Love is our reference point for diligence and efficiency.  Love describes proper decision-making and defines a good one.  Love is the decision!
Love is life with its sleeves rolled up, digging deep in servanthood.  Love removes any intimidation of messy missions and enables a genuine joy in sacrificing for another.  Love will tirelessly take up the orphan's cause and boldly rescue the abused from the clutches of the hater.  Love will stir your heart! 
Love will make a business person better in business, a preacher better at preaching, a teacher better at explaining, a mother better at nurturing, a father better at protecting and a marriage better at empathy.  It will make a friend more faithful, an artist more inspired and a driver even more patient on the highway commute.  Love will make a walk slower, a run faster and a conversation deeper. 
Love clears the air, dampens discouragement, purges wrong motives and puts wind in the sails of your dreams!  Love will break your heart, wipe your tears, fund your project, trap your adversaries and lift your load.  Love will take you further than you could go on your own and lead you to the end of your life with a legacy for future generations to enjoy...because, love is the one thing that will keep your life motivated!

"...love will last forever!" 1 Corinthians 13:8

What area of my life needs an infusion of God's love?

The Unattractiveness of Begging for Attention

Thanks to the venue of social media, we get to see individuals from all walks of life barter for attention - the I'll show you what I'm doing and see if you can top it game.  Whether it's intentional or not, trying to get the recognition from others at any cost is frankly unattractive.  And, the more one does it, the less appealing that person can become.  We've all done it to some level - the bragging thing.  You know, check out who I had dinner with tonight or where our family got to go on vacation... The more we fall into the trap of trying to out-perform, the greater the chances that we'll find ourselves in the endless cycle of comparing ourselves to others.  No fun, and not attractive!  If you are constantly trying to prove something or boast about something new in your life, check yourself out more deeply.  And, pause to remember that you are loved by the God of the Universe!  Wanna know how to get healthy attention?  Be crazy generous with those who can't pay you back.  Embrace the Audience of One mentality.  Maintain a Christlike attitude with everyone.  We all need God's grace to walk this out.  Living as a child of God, enabled by that grace makes you attractive.  And, that's enough!

How can you embrace a better version of you in light of who you are in Christ?

A Leader's Attitude

As I was praying over my son before dropping him off at school this morning, I heard myself say, "And, Father, give Ethan a leader's attitude..."  I had never remembered using those actual words before in a prayer.  So, it really got me thinking about that phrase - a leader's attitude.  What does that mean?  Well, I knew what it meant for my son in preparation for his day among friends and teachers.  But there is more to the meaning of those words. 

Having the demeanor of a leader contrasts everything bullish and demeaning.  Rather, it reflects a spirit that is very much in tune with the act of leading.  Leaders lead people to a better place.  Breaking it down, leaders lead people...  They don't lead organizations or machines or offices or programs.  They lead the people behind those things.  A real leader rarely forgets about the value of what he or she does.  Leaders lead people.  And, leaders lead people to a better place.  They don't drive them or nag them or brutalize them.  They aren't manipulative with a self-seeking agenda.  No, they lead people to a better place - a better place for the people they are leading more than for the organization or program.  And, leaders expect better, hope for better, envision better, paint a picture of what it means to be better.  Better is significant because it means progress, movement in the right direction, forward into the potential of those they lead. 

A leader's attitude demonstrates an onward drive while never forgetting what it's all about - leading people.  Never underestimate your attitude as a leader.  It's the very ingredient that is indispensable to the success of what you do.

How is your attitude as a leader?  What steps can you take this week to insure the right attitude among those you lead?

Why People Skills Matter

I just recently had a phone conversation with a business vendor for my home.  A particular appliance wasn't working and I needed a repair person to come out as soon as possible.  The person that took my call just so happened to be the mechanic and began to inform me that the earliest he could get to the situation would be at least a week.  I asked if there were other repair people available or someone else I could speak with and he said that he was the only one in the office.  Sensing his disconnect, I restated the urgency of the matter to which he replied that if he knew sooner about the need, he could have worked it in sooner...  What?  I was appalled...to which I responded, "That is insulting...!"  I explained to him that if that particular appliance had evidenced any signs that it needed repair earlier, I would have called him then.  I told him that his office would be hearing from me again.  And then I said goodbye and hung up the phone in disgust. 

This is only an example and not a rant.  Had it not been for an apologetic call from the supervisor later that day who heard about my conversation with this repair person, I would have changed carriers all together.  What's the point?  People skills matter - always!  Restaurants lose customers, churches lose attendees, companies lose employees, schools lose students and marriages lose a spouse because someone didn't see that people skills were important enough.  Dealing with people in a caring, understanding and patient way helps to retain and even gain these key players in our organization and personal lives.

Granted, people will not always see it from our perspective: people can be frustrating;  people can be impatient; people can be demanding; people can be difficult.  But without a renewed knowledge of how to deal with personalities and humanity in general, our success with them is up for chance, at best.  Take time in the early part of the new year to sharpen the ability to relate well with others.  Listen intently; serve energetically; care patiently.  Make people priority, because without them, what we are doing and selling won't matter at all!

What area of your people skills can you improve in the new year?

Staying Better

I know, it sounds a bit contradicting.  How can something stay the same and still get better?  Maybe it's a play on words, but having a commitment to getting better while remaining anchored in certain values should be the pursuit of us all.  Consider this as a challenge for the new year.  When we know who we are while endeavoring to change, learn and grow - that's a prescription for staying better. 
Here's a list of helpful suggestions:

1.  Get real with yourself!  Know your personality and what you're called to do; refrain from trying to be something you're not.  At the same time, know where you need to improve.

2.  Establish values.  Identify for yourself and your organization what shouldn't change.  Let these core attributes anchor you.

3.  Courageously explore resources.  Go after resources that don't deny you of your values but stretches your thinking and increases your level of exposure.

4.  Determine to be a change agent.  Be willing to make course corrections no matter how radical; never turn a blind eye and challenge the status quo in the right attitude.  Make "better" a priority.

5.  Envision the long range plan.  What can you do daily that will positively impact legacy and encourage sustainability?  Some ingredients are meant to die and other qualities should last through the seasons of change.  It's good to know the difference. 

"Staying better" is all about staying in step with new tools and methods while staying true to your calling.  So, let it be your goal to STAY BETTER in 2014!

What needs to change today and stay the same in your life and/or organization?

Don't Make Any New Year's Resolutions!

Yes, I said it.  Refrain from the disappointing results of commitments you won't keep and goals you can't reach.  Do something more tangible...more attainable...more realistic!  Plan your growth in the new year.  Write out some doable action steps for the day-to-day.  Give God something to work with.  Put yourself in a place of cooperation.  Get in a position for real personal growth.  The last thing you want to do is come up with a list of what you want for yourself in the coming months without any real plan to get there.  Hope is not a strategy. So, pause right now and think about a plan...and, make record of it.  Then run it by some trusted individuals.  Determine if in fact it can be done and enlist some accountability.  Keep it in front of you whether you frame it or make it your cover photo on your iPad, tablet or laptop.  Review it daily.  Schedule growth into your daily routine.  Make it a priority by planning to grow and then working your plan.  Oh...and, Happy New Year!

What would a growth plan look like for you?

Thinking Right about Investing in Others

It has been proven that the smartest investment one can make is in others.  That same investment endeavor can also be the most frustrating.  The reason...?  People are fickle and, many times, unfaithful.  Just like a return on any other investment, putting resources in family, friends or associates is frankly unpredictable and, therefore, risky.  It can also be disappointing.  So, how should we view any kickback from what we put into the calling or career of others?  We should view it as EXTRA.  Wisdom should always be used in how much time and energy we give to relationships.  A continual stream of negative outcomes will sometimes require more grace and other times, a bit of distance.  But our view of what comes out of any people investment should remain the same:  low expectations.

We resource people for numerous reasons - we see potential or we want to give to discover if there is present potential in that person.  But if we fail in thinking right about investing in others, we will remain frustrated and even become embittered by the lack of sufficient returns.  This may not sound like good business, but relational investments are somewhat different...requiring a bit of space between what we do and what God does.  The Apostle Paul gave this reminder: "It’s not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What’s important is that God makes the seed grow" (1 Corinthians 3:7).  Don't allow your emotions to be held hostage by what comes out of your investments in others.  Set yourself free by remaining faithful to invest and then releasing it to God for greater increase.

How can you view your relational investments in a healthier way?  What relational investments to do you need to release to the God of increase?

Family Style

I love the restaurants that serve "family style" - when wide plates of entrees and deep bowls of sides are placed on the table for everyone to share.   It requires lots of interaction, cooperation and patience.  Please pass the potatoes...  Can I serve you up some salad...?  I'll wait till that bowl of pasta comes down this way...  So, here's the question:  What if church life was more like those "family style" experiences?  What if the body of Christ knew what it meant to truly interact, cooperate and "serve up" some good manners with each other?  I guess the bigger question is...does the local assembly where you gather resemble a family?  The more the church grows and the larger it becomes, the demonstration of family must be more deliberate and systematic.  And, just because a church is smaller doesn't mean she has an inclusive atmosphere.  The reality is that people are looking for a place and a group with whom to belong.  We just can't take that for granted.  No assumptions should ever be made that anyone will be integrated.  Furthermore, if you consider yourself a spiritual leader among that congregation, one of your primary responsibilities is to make sure "family style" is happening...and, at many levels.  As a leader, if you can't embrace the place you are serving, it's a good chance that neither will others to the extent that is necessary.  Show leadership on this one...and, ask the "look in the mirror" questions:  Is there real interaction where you worship...?  Does cooperation seem natural or forced...?  Does the spirit of the church reflect a patience, a humility, a servant's heart...?  That's just some of the questions to consider when you evaluate the "family style" of the church you call home.  Don't settle for "drive through" Christianity.  Live with the aim of getting around a table, knowing who you eat with, and enjoying the real life of gospel-living.  Serve it up "family style."  Okay, I'm hungry now!

How can you as a leader encourage more of a family dynamic in the church you are serving?

Why Leadership Development is Not for Everyone

Yes, I said it...  And, I'm not playing the exclusion game either.  The point isn't whether everyone could actually grow, but rather if they will.  It really boils down to two simple ingredients:  being teachable and applying what you learn.  And, the first is a deal-breaker.  If someone isn't teachable, they aren't reachable.  I've come in contact with people who really think they know more than most...or, at least all of those around them.  When legitimate opportunities to learn are in place and such occasions aren't seized, pride might be a factor.  Every leader needs to continually check his or her personal ego meter. Paul David Tripp, in his book Dangerous Calling, said, "No one is more influential in your life than you are, because no one talks to you more than you do." What are you saying to yourself about potential growth experiences...?  What are you saying to yourself about yourself...?  I was recently in one of those particular moments, asking myself why I wasn't getting anything out of what was being shared.  And, the truth that gripped my heart was profound:  I wasn't doing my part!  Immediately, I made a new commitment to practice attentiveness and a posture of learning by putting a specific system in place.  Leadership development won't be for everyone, but it can be for you...if you remain teachable!

What does a moment of personal self-examination reveal about your learning posture?  What system can you confirm or add to insure that leadership development is for you?

The Power of the Spoken "Thank You"

It's the feelings solicited when that authentic appreciation is expressed...  But, really, it's not about who receives the gratitude as it is the one who gives it.  Actually, it does our heart well when we utter authentically what we were taught to say early on as a part of those "magic words."  What would happen if we chose to practice "thank you" in everyday language and conversations?  What if we looked for things to verbally express appreciation?  What if key and strategic relationships experienced our thankfulness every time they came in contact with us?  My conviction is that such assertions make the simple more profound, the mundane more significant and the casual more intentional.  The uttered regularity of gratitude molds an attractive, engaging attitude and perspective.  When we accept the responsibility of giving thanks, life is slowed to the level of enjoyment and sincerity.  But, this lifestyle of thanksgiving doesn't just happen because we know it's right or we desire it.  Gordon MacDonald wrote, in his book A Resilient Life, "Thankfulness is a learned transaction, and it comes with the realization that I neither deserve nor am entitled to blessings.  At best, I am a graced recipient of all I have and am."  So true!  We learn this lifestyle by practicing daily.  As a matter of fact, begin by stopping right now and consider making a list of even the common things done around you; then, express gratitude to the particular people responsible for making them happen.  And, watch the power that is released from the spoken "thank you."

Who can you thank today either by writing it or saying it face to face?